Tag: Suffering

The Other Shoe

Job 42, Psalms, Scripture

Some seasons of life throw a lot at you. You wonder what else could go wrong. “Waiting for the other shoe to drop” started as an expression referring to the experience of living in thin-walled and crowded boarding houses of New York City and Chicago in the early 20th century. Tenants could easily hear one shoe and then another drop in the upstairs apartment when a neighbor got home from work and headed to bed. Late at night, noisy, and predictable, we all are more aware of the dropping sound of the shoes of life. The first shoe doesn’t seem so bad, but anticipating the second one is distracting. The expression has come to mean the expectation of an inevitable negative event and the stress that goes with it.

When the other shoes keep dropping, you wonder if there will ever be an end to this pattern. You ask repeated questions like the Psalmists did – “How long?” (Ps. 6:3; 13:1;90:13; 94:3,…)

Right now, my shoes of life include a friend whose spouse is in the last days of a two year battle with cancer and the familiar, but incredibly difficult hospice predictions as the end draws near. My shoes include a loved one with unresolved serious health issues. My shoes include a close friend that received a pacemaker just in time. My shoes include managing healthcare for a 90-something parent. My shoes include a new friend recently diagnosed with liver cancer. The list goes on, but there will always be a second shoe in these pairings, and I can’t help but think I’m not ready for whatever it is. And, waiting is just very hard. Life is inevitably hard. Where can I stuff my stress? “How long?” is the million dollar question.

I’ve asked God many questions, while still placing my hope in Him. Psalm 13:1-6 (ESV) provides a better “other shoe” perspective without minimizing the hard stuff or abandoning trust in God: “How long, O Lord? Will You forget me forever? How long will You hide Your face from me? How long must I take counsel in my soul and have sorrow in my heart all the day? How long shall my enemy be exalted over me? Consider and answer me, O Lord my God; light up my eyes, lest I sleep the sleep of death, lest my enemy say, ‘I have prevailed over him,’ lest my foes rejoice because I am shaken. But I have trusted in Your steadfast love; my heart shall rejoice in Your salvation. I will sing to the Lord, because He has dealt bountifully with me.”

Job was right in that terrible place of facing more suffering than seemed bearable, yet had to completely surrender to the sovereignty of God without yet knowing about the hope of the Gospel. In the New Testament we are blessed to receive unimaginable comfort in the sovereignty of God, because we now have a Risen Savior Who came down and experienced comprehensive darkness and every kind of suffering. Jesus is the reason we can trust in God’s steadfast love and salvation. He is the reason we can sing. He is the reason we can hope. He is the reason we can experience His ultimate bounty.

When the other shoe drops, which it will, I will keep my heart fixed on Christ. Hebrews 4:15-16 (ESV) says, “For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but One Who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.”

Even without the New Testament Gospel news being unfolded yet, Job personally experienced God’s presence and answers to his “how long” kinds of questions. Job 42:1-5 (NIV) is one of my favorite testimonies: “Then Job replied to the Lord: ‘I know that You can do all things; no purpose of Yours can be thwarted. You [God] asked, “Who is this that obscures My plans without knowledge?” Surely I spoke of things I did not understand, things too wonderful for me to know. You [God] said, “Listen now, and I will speak; I will question you, and you shall answer Me.” My ears had heard of You but now my eyes have seen You.’ “

I may ask lots of questions of God, I may not feel ready for any shoes to drop, and I will surely not escape suffering on planet earth, but my Anchor is solidly Jesus in the inevitable storms of life. As one sufferer put it, cancer is just a little “c” and Christ is definitely a big “C.” Keeping that perspective makes the “other shoes” quietly land in the sturdy arms of Jesus rather than on the thinner-than-paper floor.

Twisted But Beautiful

Scripture

My head tells me that suffering is a natural part of life, but my heart tells me to avoid pain, to figure out a way to be exempt from pain, to do whatever I can to erase pain. My natural response to life is to slow down the aging process, vindicate myself against people who fail me, smooth things over, and work overtime to squelch the thorns of frustration involved in the regular recurring things of life on planet earth. Wishing to turn back the things that should have never happened – a fender bender, a broken dish, a jammed printer, a throbbing tooth, a fractured arm, a WiFi outage, credit card theft, the list goes on. Meanwhile laboring to prevent these frustrations of life as an ongoing occupation of the mind and body.

I have always loved the story of Joseph in Genesis 37-50 and the conclusion in Genesis 50:20 when Joseph says to his brothers, “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.” If you follow the story more closely, you will find that God was always near and accessible to Joseph, even in prison. God did not leave Joseph alone, but blessed him with compassionate daily provisions that sustained him.

If we will simply dare to look, looking for those compassionate daily provisions is an ongoing occupation of the mind and body that is fruitful and life-sustaining. Finding those compassionate daily provisions is possible with an eye on the goodness of God and His promise in Romans 8:28 that “He causes all things to work for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.”

As believers, imagining our suffering as our number one enemy in life is terribly short-sighted and self-focused. However, interpreting our suffering in light of sincerely trusting God removes the wasting of pain. If we take the long view and focus on His glory, unwasted pain becomes an eternal investment. Trusting God in our suffering includes the heavenly dimension of the greater things He seeks to accomplish. Pain then possesses meaning, not randomness. And, God’s trademark is turning suffering into benefit, tears into joy, loss into redemption, earthly into heavenly, fear into courage, darkness into light, doubt into faith, death into life.

I so need God’s perspective to be able to see that pain doesn’t have to be wasted. If I believe that God uses pain to draw me into greater dependence on Him, I might stop to ask myself what I have erroneously been dependent upon other than God. If I realize that I am not just a physical being, but a spiritual being, I might be able to see beyond the assaults on my body and mind and claim the truths of Romans 5:3-5 which says, “Not only so, but we glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.”

The evil actions of Joseph’s brothers seemed to shatter his life as a teenager. Selling younger brother Joseph into Egyptian slavery was a monumental crime, yet his life was spared from death – a compassionate daily provision. Even as a slave, Joseph served Pharaoh diligently. Joseph maintained his integrity. Joseph depended on God. There were daily compassionate provisions as Joseph rose to roles of responsibility, even in prison after the false charges of Potiphar’s wife. Once again, Joseph maintained his integrity and was called out of prison to interpret Pharoah’s dreams. He indicated that it would be God only who could interpret dreams, not man. So, God enabled him to interpret Pharoah’s dreams. Another daily compassionate provision.

I’m looking for God’s compassionate daily provisions. Although I’m not in prison, I have had some self-pitying moments about the pandemic being like prison. Yet I’ve visited friends and family often, in non-traditional ways. I have been graced to have pretty days to go on morning walks with my daughter who lives close by. I have been blessed to have a car that works fine. And, I have been able to be creative in the acquisition of groceries and other supplies. Suffering might have simply been more mental than physical during the last year or so – with fears surrounding an invisible health menace, questions about life ever getting back to what was felt to be normal, concerns about a divisive and hate-filled country, wonder about a teetering economy, and general fatigue over inconveniences involved in waiting on God’s compassionate daily provisions. But, those compassions were definitely there.

I need to open my eyes. When pain isn’t wasted, I can be free to see the compassionate daily provisions of the Holy Spirit – perseverance, character, and hope. God will expose something important and turn a season of suffering into benefit. God is faithfully working out His purposes. Similar to the pattern of Joseph’s story, we can be sure that what God is now accomplishing is the saving of many lives, His ultimate purpose. We might not know the how or why, but we can be sure that each day contains a compassionate daily provision for those who are in Christ Jesus. This is when the twisting becomes beautiful.