My Tossings

Psalm 56:8 (ESV) says “You have kept count of my tossings; put my tears in Your bottle. Are they not in Your book?”

Morning Prayer:

God, “You have kept count of my tossings.” My anxious musings and fears of failure; My panicky what-ifs, my phobias; My regrets and life-altering decisions; My disappointments in myself and others; My attempts to engineer circumstances; My relentless quest to control things; My unmet expectations and dreams; My leanings toward self-preservation and achievement.

God, “You have put my tears in Your bottle.” My hurts from companions and familiar friends; My judgments not in tune with Your grace; My prayerlessness at every banquet; My unfaithful heart and mind; My decaying body and energy of life; My secret shames and hateful attitudes; My motives not in alignment with Your purposes; My longings unfulfilled by people in my life; My endpoints resulting from sin and pride; My loneliness when absent from strong believers and gospel conversations; My drifting when I put aside Your Word for any length of time.

God, “are my tears not in your book?” You have said they are in Your Word. You hear my whole prayers and even my half prayers; You silence the noise of the enemy; You shelter me from pursuant persons and troubles; You listen to my ventings and settle me; You correct my erroneous thoughts; You regroup me with Your comfort; You remind me of Your love and care; You redeem my soul in Your tenacious safety; You give me a spacious place to recoup; You provide what I don’t even know I need; You infuse my life with creative outlets; You have called me to be Your child.

Surely, my tears count. My tears are received by You; My tears do not evaporate into the Universe; My tears remain in Your capable hold; My tears are in Your safe-keeping. Your bottle never reaches capacity.

Until one day, My tears will be transformed by You into tears of joy!

Amen.

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